Thursday, January 11, 2007

Geoge Bush's idea of a "mistake" is to be an unsuccessful criminal

Bush: My Iraq polices have been a mistake.

America: Wow, is that ever the understatement of the century!

Bush: Yes . . . we finally agree.

America: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Are you saying we shouldn't have preemptively invaded Iraq in the first place, or are you saying it's a mistake not to be systematically withdrawing from Iraq -- much like we withdrew from Vietnam?

Bush: No, no, no. I'm saying we didn't invade Iraq "hard enough". That's why I'm calling for a dramatic escalation of American troops.

America: But this is like a thief apologizing to a judge for not stealing enough money or like an abusive husband apologizing to his wife for not hitting her hard enough.

Bush: Uh . . .

America: The MISTAKE, you evil pinhead, is being in Iraq in the first place. The MISTAKE is not starting a phased withdrawal tomorrow. The MISTAKE is killing over 3,000 heroic Americans just to make your Texas energy corporate cronies bloated vampires of greed.

Bush: But, don't you understand, I'm admitting I made a mistake.

America: Look George, let's cut to the chase. The mistake is YOU. You were a mistake in the Guard. You were a mistake when you got your candyass Daddy Degree from Yale. You were the mistake when you trashed Texas education while you were their blood sucking governor. You were a mistake when you stole two presidential elections. And on and on and on. You are the poisoned well from which only poisonous water can be drunk. And speaking of a drunk . . .

Bush: But Karl told me this time I didn't have to wear a box on my back and I can keep doing exactly what I want to do if I say it's a "mistake" NOT to be doing exactly what I want to do.

America: Piss off.